Ok - this is a short entry but I have to write all this down...if only to process this day. The morning began with grief and distress. Ella has been waiting WEEKS! to go on a play date somewhere OTHER than home. I realize after the 60 minute bout of wailing that Ella is bored. She's bored with this house. She's bored with her siblings. And damn, I'm pretty confident she's bored with me. Perhaps her recent talks about our 'old, boring' house should have clued me in to the fact that she's ready to move on. Move on to bigger and better things. Move on to having play dates AWAY from home. Move on to enjoying all the things that come with being somewhere else - the different toys, the different food, the different rules, the different cool & exciting mom. I'm hoping she'll realize that the grass isn't always greener on the other side. I'm hoping that she'll return to enjoying her family, return to playing with her toys without the sullen, sulking attitude of recent days. I thought I had years before this attitude, before these talks, before my need to send her off to a far corner of the house so that I can hear myself thing. She's not even five yet. What will 14 look like...it'll be blurry because I'm sure to be drunk. :)
Along with Ella - she's one of four you know - we have Calum who decided early today that he wanted to see how close I could come to insanity. First it was applesauce across the kitchen then it was using his baby sister as a pillow. These are just some added extras to the continuum of life lessons he learns in a day. I love this boy - I just don't understand him sometimes. What I DO understand, is when he comes and tells me he's sorry. He loves me. 'You superhero mommy.' I'll take those as payment for my bill at the ward.
And now, at 4:02pm, we're headed out to the pool. This after an earlier attempt was thwarted by a thunderstorm. And the response to this storm, and my bearing of bad news...'Are you kidding me, Mommy. I'm just going to be BORED AGAIN!'
Oh -- and not so short, really.
ReplyDeleteSend her to Grammies she and Calum surely will not be bored!!!!!!!! Thunderstorms here can be an adventure....think about it.........
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